I hate to tell you this, but this is the time where you can truly say you learn what it's like to be sad. Of course you've felt upset before, like when Dad ate the last cake or after an argument with your sister. But you're about to learn what it's like to wake up and be so sad and afraid, you don't actually want to go into school.
See, a few people are going to turn on you. A few people who you genuinely thought were your friends, and who you thought you were safe with, aren't entirely the people you though they were. You'd think pushing you down and making you feel like utter crap would be enough right? Ha, how wrong you are! I don't want to say you're being bullied because, compared to some horror stories you hear, it was mere childish taunts and teasing. But take one already anxious 10 year old, add said taunting and take away the friends she thought she had, and you're left with a big, fat mess. Add in the fact you've always been a bit too overly proud so won't tell anyone you're actually upset and mix in the natural insecurities you begin to develop as you approach your teenage years. That's what 'sad' feels like.
Y'know what Dot, as much as it pains you. You have to tell someone. I know you're pretty strong minded and for the first couple of months, it's like water off a ducks back, but after a while of being alone in a choppy ocean, even a duck will start to struggle. (You're still not very good at English so sorry for the crappy metaphor)
You're cool with those girls now though. If I'm honest you don't speak to them anymore. Not because of what happened- things brush over in a couple of weeks and you're pals again- but because as you grow up and move schools, you're just naturally separated. You grow apart and meet new people.
It's weird. That's the main thing that sticks out from those years, despite the fact so many good things happened. I can't make out to be completely innocent though, I've been rude and simply cruel to people in the past, but that's for a later letter.
Advice for 10 year old me? Be kind and have courage. Stop being such a pushover, but be polite about it. There's nothing wrong with being nice- even if that person is horrid to you. I heard something recently that I think you would appreciate hearing at 10 years old. It was by Carrie Hope Fletcher (you've got a few years before you learn who she is), who I believe heard it from someone else. Basically, if someone is trying to bring you down, it means they are already below you. Don't let yourself be dragged down to that level.
Have Courage and Be Kind